My grown daughter recently told me that my husband (her stepfather) had "tried to do things to her" while she was growing up and that she no longer wanted him in her life. She did not go into details and said she would respect whatever I chose to do. Initially I was not only shocked but furious at my husband but when I confronted him he seemed genuinely shocked too--and horrified that anything he might have done would have ever been perceived in that way. I've known this man for over 25 years and I feel like I know him and I want to believe him but I also saw the pain my daughter was in and believe her too. I have been frozen into inaction of any kind. This hangs over all of us. My daughter said she would respect my decisions but I can tell when we speak on the phone my not having left yet is like I am not supporting her. I feel like I need the details of this so I can understand what has happened and how I didn't know it was going on. She was a happy, smart, sociable, loving child and adult to both of us---no disorders--nothing. Now she says she has said it and is moving on. This terrible thing has just locked me in place and I don't know what to do next.
THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.
- Dr. Dombeck responds to questions about psychotherapy and mental health problems, from the perspective of his training in clinical psychology.
- Dr. Dombeck intends his responses to provide general educational information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual(s).
- Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses.
- No correspondence takes place.
- No ongoing relationship of any sort (including but not limited to any form of professional relationship) is implied or offered by Dr. Dombeck to people submitting questions.
- Dr. Dombeck, Mental Help Net and CenterSite, LLC make no warranties, express or implied, about the information presented in this column. Dr. Dombeck and Mental Help Net disclaim any and all merchantability or warranty of fitness for a particular purpose or liability in connection with the use or misuse of this service.
- Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.